One Delicious Day

Yesterday was absolutely delectable.

It was my last day before I start this final week of chemo/radiation treatment (I’m counting down right now – 15 minutes till I have to take my chemo pills again). And a friend took me to get a massage. Oh heavenly bliss! I’ve been in knots since last June, and to have someone working that tension out was . . . words fail me. The table was even heated. I’m not sure I’ve ever been more cozy or at ease wearing no clothes in a stranger’s house.

Then Amy and I went for yummy burgers (hers real, mine fake) at W Seattle EasyStreet’s cafe. And then . . . we went to Group Health to visit Amy’s newborn baby! He’s literally 2 lbs bigger than he was the last time I saw him – he’s practically doubled in size. I was hanging out in a rocking chair while Amy did her thing, and it was so soothing to just chill and be quiet in the little baby care unit. Tiny little lives all around working hard to breathe and make their hearts beat at the same time. Every time a small one cried, someone would start the “oooooooohh, shhhhhhh, oooooooh” noises. These must be universal noises for soothing. They soothed me, at least, and the babies never cried for long. I was there enjoying the peaceful ambience far longer than I meant to be.

Then I took the bus home, and got home just in time for my friend Kelly from work to come over bearing gifts of food. Probably one of the things that has kept me sanest throughout this whole process has been the fact that I have time to spend with friends and family. Sometimes we’ve had to put a cap on it when I get super tired, but overall, it’s been just as important to my emotional well-being to have these face-to-face connections as the treatment has been to my physical well-being.

Then Chris and I went out to drop off movies, and I talked him into going out to dinner for St. Paddy’s day. (His last name being Thompson, he was joking that St. Paddy’s just reminds him to collect the rent.) We went up to Olive You in Greenwood, one of our favorite restaurants, but one we don’t get to very often because its so far north and it can take forever to get your meal. But it was so delicious and the perfect way to cap off what had been an extremely pleasant day.

Now I have to go take my chemo pills. (Mr. Yuck face)

Savoring the Moment (and the Pastry)

I forced myself to get up off the duff and go for a walk today. Luckily for me, the sun appeared shortly after I set out, making the umbrella in my hand completely (and fortunately!) useless.

I made a circuit of lower QA from our apartment, and stopped about half-way through to rest in a little cafe called Nielsen’s Pastries.

Let me pause for a moment to dwell on Nielsen’s Pastries.

I’ve meant to stop in there for at least a couple of years, and just never have, even though it’s ridiculously close to our apartment (2nd/Mercer). It’s been recommended to me by friends, and today seemed like a good day for a trial. The first impression on walking in is spacious second-handedness. Despite a couple scarily-large wedding cake molds in the windows, there are neatly stacked piles of old books and magazines throughout the space, old chairs, old tables, and a couple of old recliners – the comfy, broken-in (or broken-down, depending on your definition) kind.

And then there is the pastry counter.

Let me just say that it was probably the best pastry and latte I’ve ever had. I’m sure the exercise and the cold factors into that statement, but my pastry was just perfectly crisp and buttery, with enough, but not too much, cinnamon.

But what really made my stop in there so enjoyable was watching the customers – everyone from the old couple grandly announcing from the doorway their plan to order a custom cake to the two young businesswomen guiltily buying themselves a couple cookies each in the middle of the afternoon. Every single face, without exception, lit up with delight as they looked at the selection in the display and tried to decide which one was calling their name. It was made sweeter by the fact that just moments before, that same expression was on my face.

They were also playing Fleet Foxes overhead, as if to prove their good taste.

The sun was shining in the windows, I had a good book in my hands – and the moment could not have been more peaceful or pleasant.

Songs About Love

One of the girls in radiation made me about five different music mixes, and one of them is songs about love. And it just got me thinking . . . .

This is the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through. I wouldn’t wish a trial like this on anybody. It has made me sick, it has made me weak, and my life hangs in the balance. And yet . . . at the same time, I’ve had so many gestures of love from so many people, and that generosity has often completely overwhelmed me. The comments of support and encouragement from people I barely know, the prayers, the meals, the rides, the visits. It has made me feel valued and loved in a way that I wish everyone could experience. And it’s made this fight so much easier.

And so I send a thank you to the universe. To everyone who has sent me a good thought, to everyone who has prayed for me, to everyone who has made Chris’ and my life easier by providing a meal, to everyone who has gifted me with rides and visits. You don’t know what it means to me, what it means to us, and I don’t know that I could ever repay this debt to any of you.

“Beggar that I am, I am even poor in thanks.” – Hamlet

Life Continues . . .

Sorry for the infrequent posts this week. Being between rounds of chemo, and not having started radiation yet – I don’t have much to talk about.

Except for . . .

Chris and I going out with friends and by ourselves and being normal people who go out which we haven’t been in months and months and months!

Friday we went out to a live theatre show at On The Boards with our bff’s, Scott and Amy! Then YESTERDAY – wedding planning resumed! We met with a photographer, went to look at wedding bands, and even ate out in a restaurant when it got late (and I was starving). And TODAY, a friend is hanging out with me this afternoon. I’m actually having a busy weekend, which is totally unusual, because for the last five and a half months most of my weekends have consisted of laying in bed trying to not be in too much pain. It’s so . . . wonderful . . . to glimpse a return of normal life (aka, life after cancer).

Other big news – I’ve gained 3 lbs since Tuesday! And my doctor has started me taking vitamin D supplements. Apparently my vit. D levels are very low (big surprise in Seattle), which contributes a great deal to energy/fatigue. Also (didn’t know this), there is mounting evidence that vitamin D supplements (the supplements – not exposure to the sun) helps protect the cells in your body against cancer.

So get your vitamin D!!!!

Kermit Is More Than Just A Frog

I have a new hairstylist, and his name is Kermit.

My sweet friend Kelly, from work, booked me a hair appointment at Habitude in Ballard. And put me into the hands of a master. I walked out of the salon with crazy, commercial-glamour hair (that will probably never be repeated, because he spent about a half hour blow-drying it).

Then we went out for dinner, and just chatted away. It was so nice to go out and be a girl again! Especially nice was the fact that the most activity our afternoon took was sitting in a chair – which is about all I feel up to right now.

Picture of hair below.

Feelin’ Good Again

One day left to me before I start chemo round II, and I’m so happy to say that I’m feeling good again today! The sniffles seem to have disappeared (for the moment), and, this morning anyway, I’m feeling pretty energetic.

Hip hip hooray!

I’m hoping it lasts all day, but I’ll probably get tired again at some point. C’est la vie. I’ll just nap till I’m better again.

I had to go on painkillers again last night. But I lasted 42 hours without a single one! And hopefully this next round of chemo will keep up the good work and help me to not be in pain again. It’s a lovely thing to be pain-free. I appreciate it so much, and am looking forward to the day when it’s no longer remarkable.  )

And . . . the roasted chicken was excellent.

Happy Santas

Ha – Chris and I were invited to this.

If we weren’t apartment-bound at the moment, you can bet we would have been helping spread the cheer!  ;o)

Aubrey

Snow Day!

Today has been so fun! Chris, my Mississippi boy, is completely entranced by the snow. We need to get a wagon for me, so that when he goes out for a walk, he can drag me along behind him.  )

We’ve been taking pictures of the snow out our window, but we have an old point and shoot, so we’ll have to wait till we get the picture CD from Bartell’s to post anything on here.

Some friends were supposed to come over for dinner tonight, but the weather changed those plans. In fact – I had a pretty busy weekend planned, and the weather didn’t allow me to do any of it! C’est la vie. I enjoyed cuddling down in bed and watching the snow fall outside my window. So we made dinner at home instead, and afterwards Chris completely trounced me in dominoes. I was doing great, until one really bad round. I’m more competitive than I’d like to admit – I was a pretty sore loser.

I’ll get the picture thing figured out soon so I can make the blog more interesting, I promise!

Pimp Aubrey’s Crutches Party!

What better way to celebrate the holidays than by attending the official “Pimp Aubrey’s Crutches” Party! Yay for beating cancer and making crutches the next “it” accessory!

When: Tuesday, Dec. 23rd, 7pm-9pm

Who’s Invited: Aubrey’s friends and family (probably you’re one of them, if you’re reading this blog).

Where: Aubrey & Chris’ apartment – send me an email if you’d like to come. If I know you, I’ll send you directions.

RULES (yes, I have to have ‘em):

• Everyone leaves at 9pm. I get tired super easy, have to get up  very early for chemo the next morning, and this rule will be enforced.
• Please bring either: 1) something with which to decorate my crutches, 2) something to eat, or 3) something to drink!
• If you bring something to decorate my crutches: 1) must be family-friendly (I have to go to work and out in public, after all), 2) should not ruin my clothes when I use the crutches, 3) should not impair my ability to use the crutches (it’s hard enough, for cryin’ out loud).

(Kevin – I really liked the idea of wine bottle holder and tray of cheese and crackers!)

I think that’s all the details! Shoot me an email if you have any questions!